I grew up in church. My parents never joked about attending church services every other day of the week. If it were possible to be born believing in God, that would be me.

By five, I already knew how to pray. I prayed when there was no food at home. I prayed about what we would eat for dinner. I dreaded the days when it was swallow and melon soup when we could easily have rice and stew twice in one day. No shaming a five year old.

At the end of every service, I would kneel down and ask God for one thing or the other. That was the pattern. You ask. You wait. You expect it to happen someday. That was how prayer was taught to me. The culture teaches us to ask for a new house, financial stability, protection, a stable relationship, and many other things. And the only response we count as valid is when those things appear physically. But prayer is much more than that.

As I grew in my personal walk with God, I began to see that prayer was not just a simple “christian culture.” It was something I had to step into. Prayer is dialogue. It is conversation. It is talking to God and hearing him speak back.

Jeremiah 33:3 MSG says, “Call to me and I will answer you. I’ll tell you marvelous and wondrous things that you could never figure out on your own.” It does not say “call to me and wait for things to appear.” It says “call to me and I will answer you. I will tell you things.” Tell. That is exchange.

The first time I truly understood this, I made it very dramatic. One morning, I set out two chairs. I sat on one and placed the other in front of me. I imagined the Holy Spirit sitting there. I spoke to him as if he was physically present. And that day, scripture opened up to me in ways I cannot fully explain. The words were personal. They were clear and alive. And those revelations still hold my convictions steady today. It may sound childlike. But that is exactly how the Holy Spirit speaks. Like friends sitting together, talking about their day over soda. Simple and easy. That is what fellowship feels like. So maybe the real question when we pray is not, did I ask for enough? Maybe it is, did I listen? Did I receive direction, wisdom, correction, or comfort? Did I allow him to tell me things beyond what I can see?

1 Thessalonians 5:17 in TPT tells us to make our lives a prayer. That means prayer is not an occasional activity. It becomes the way we live. In 2023, when I was serving as a steward on campus, someone pulled me aside after a meeting about prayer. She asked me quietly, “Do you think God would want to hear about people I met or someone I’m crushing on?” I smiled. “God would love to hear everything,” I told her. “Every single thing.”

Matthew 10:30-31 in TPT helps us understand that our father cares deeply about even the smallest detail of our lives. Many of us wonder the same thing. Does God really want to hear about my ordinary day? My random thoughts? My small joys? Yes! He wants to hear about how your day went even though he was there for every minute of it. And when you build that habit of talking to him about everything, you begin to notice something. He answers and he guides you. Over time, all your decisions start to become informed by the Holy Spirit. That is a life of prayer.

Prayer is also fellowship. Man was created for fellowship. Even after the fall, when Adam and Eve left the garden and no longer walked with God the same way, the desire for fellowship did not disappear. It could not. Genesis 4:26 tells us that during the time of Enosh, people began to call on the name of Yahweh. They started to pray. They found their way back through prayer.

Also, even when you do not know what to pray, you are not alone. Romans 8:26 says the spirit helps us in our weakness. When we do not know how to pray, he prays through us. Prayer is not just a culture we inherited. It is a life we enter. It is daily fellowship. It is conversation. It is discovering who God is afresh all the time and waking up each day wondering what he will show you next.

About three years ago, one hot afternoon, I was preparing for church before heading for campus. I was praying, minding my business, when I heard, very clearly, “Prepare now. You are going to meet someone.” I paused. Meet someone? I checked the time. I had about five solid hours before service. Five. The last thing I wanted was to go and sit down on campus staring into space like I was simply admiring the atmosphere. But God had said it.

Now, these were my early days. I could hear God, yes. But I was not yet bold enough to walk up to people confidently saying, “God said.” I was still in the “God truly said but let me be calm and keep it to myself a bit” phase. Still, I prepared. I dressed up properly. If I was going to meet someone divinely orchestrated, I could not show up looking like I rolled out of bed. I got to school. Then I saw him. And immediately, the Holy Spirit said, “That is him.” My heart was thumping very loudly. 

But I walked up to him anyway and said, “Hi… I have a word for you.” Then I started telling him things about his family. Specific things. Things I absolutely could not have known. I had never met him before. I had never met anyone connected to him. And yet the words just kept flowing. At that point, even I was thinking, wow! God, you are really serious about this. He was stunned. I had his full attention. After that day, I began teaching him the word.

And he kept coming back. Again and again. But honestly, it was not even about him. It was about me. That single moment did something to me. It built my confidence in the quiet place. It settled something inside me. I walked away that day thinking, I can actually hear God. Not in theory or because someone told me so. But because I had experienced it. That simple encounter strengthened my confidence in a way nothing else had.